This morning, I dropped Julia at school and then drove by the cemetery to visit Anita and Peter’s grave site. Yesterday, I asked them to work on the dirt fill because the bad rain had washed away some of the soil. I was told that they would fix the dirt and were nearly ready to lay the sod on top of the grave site.
The site looked great this morning, totally raked flat with new dirt added and prepped for the sod. I brushed some dirt particles off the temporary marker then I talked to Penny about her mom and brother.
For me, the grave site is a focal point where I can release my grief. When I am there I can be totally thinking about Anita and Peter and mourn them – without the mundane worries of a normal day hanging on me.
As we left, I was softly reciting a line from Lenny Kravitz’s “Thinking of You”:
“Are you missing me the way that I’m missing you today?”
As I sung, a leaf fell from far above and landed on the newly raked dirt. It was followed by a second leaf within moments. Both landed before I even finished the one line.
It was as if Anita and Peter were answering my question. I started laughing and crying at the same time. As I drove away, I reached out with my feelings to imagine Anita hugging me and smiling. She was missing me.
OK, tears on this one. Remember to always watch for signs. They are always there, we just need to be quiet and listen. Sooo happy for you. You know Anita and Peter are watching over you. They really haven’t left! Be open and you will hear, feel, and see. Glad the grave site is leveled off and sod will soon be laid. And here we all thought it’d be next summer before the soil settled and would be sodded. This immense rain is another one of God’s wonderful answers to those questions of Ben’s. Hope you can take him over to see, talk, and listen soon. AND I hope you can teach all of the kids to be still and listen for signs. Be sure to tell them this story. Great post today- adds more hope for tomorrows.